Wow, look, another update, and so soon. Yeah, I'm bored. So I'm not all that into this intruduction thing at the moment, but I wrote this last Christmas, at the start of what was to become one crazy new year. So here it is.

Before We Looked for the Strings

Can we ever go back?

To become again what we were

When our lives weren’t so complicated

When the world held wonder

And we neither thought nor worried about tomorrow

The first blanket of winter snow held boundless joy and play

When we though only of sled-riding, and not how to get to work through the cold and ice

I loved the snow before I had to drive in it

Coming down the stairs on Christmas morning

It didn’t matter how many presents there were, or what was under all that shiny paper

Santa remembered, that was enough, proof that there was magic in the world

Tangible evidence that all that unseen and only dreamt of was possible

When even the simplest magic trick held fascination

Before we looked for the strings

Until we knew that all magic was a trick

That all the world a cloak and dagger lie

And then we knew

We understood, and took one more step on the winding road to maturity

Alas, there is no Neverland

Perhaps it isn’t wrong; it’s nothing but inevitable

But haven’t you ever wanted to go back?

Go back to the dreams you started with

To see the world through your own eyes

Long before you were the “you” you see in the mirror?

When every minute of every day was a new possibility of discovery

When you refused naptime instead of begging for it

When you believed in magic

And loved the snow

And ran for the love of the wind in your hair, not because you are late for class

Responsibility was a word that slipped right off your shoulders

Instead of sitting there like the well-known raven

Croaking “Nevermore”

When your Christmas rush involved deciding what to ask for from Santa

Trusting that your wish would be received

When thinking of family gatherings gave you a thrill of happiness, not the start of a headache

A brief moment when you only had to be in one place at a time, not three

And there were always enough hours in a day

A simpler time

A time long since past

A childhood gone, but not forgotten

Many things we have gained and lost in the passing of the years

Each minute born as the old one dies

And with each strike of the hour we have changed

We may look back, and for the briefest instant regain that self that we called “I” in days long past

But we may never again become that one; what time has changed we cannot undo

A clock clicks only forward

Maybe that’s the better way

But haven’t you ever wanted to go back?

Look, look, it's an update. Where? Yeah, I know, it's been a while.....ok, a long while. Sorry about that, peoples. So do me a favor and give me a yell if you haven't given up on reading this yet b/c A. It sucks, or B. I haven't updated in like three years. But anywhoo, let's give this thing a whirl. Ok, this one takes some explaination. It's not all that recent, but it's one of like three poems I've written in reference to love (i know, i know, shut up). But it's not about who and what you thing it's about, that's all I'm saying. I just wrote it....because I could. Ok, guess that's it for now. Like I said, drop me a comment if you're still here. And here we go again....

These Old Walls

These old walls.

Close in around me

This old house

Is quiet and empty

Each creak of each dusty floorboard calls your name

Since they day you left its streets,

This dirty old town seems so much smaller

And in freedom, I find there is less to do

All is as nothing

The sun has no warmth

Spring’s first grass no green

The bluest of sapphire skies seems veiled

The clearest of days is gray

Even the bejeweled stars in their icy loveliness

No longer split the sky to strike my heart

A silly girl’s song, a freshly plucked daisy

All turn to ash in my mind

My favored darkness, that echoing night

Child’s dreams and the romance of youth

Of knights and widow’s walks

And long strolls beneath the watchful sky

Light a fire in my mind

A fire that wilts with the distance

As each passing day carries you away

Until it fades to embers that burn with a golden light

Bright but full of pain

How is it that I, so aloof now need

The sound of your voice, the feel of my hand in yours

To see your eyes when I close mine,

A month ago I would never have thought

How is it that I, who have never needed anybody, need you so much

And in spite of my pride admit

That I can’t go on alone

How can I love the sun, when each shining ray sees you further from home

And me

How can I not embrace the night, when its darkness is all that we share?

How can I stay in this old house, this old town,

When each footstep in these streets reminds me that you aren’t by my side

My thoughts turn to you

And here I sit

Breathless

In a Hell quieter than a whisper

Alone

I shall watch the full moon through my window-pane

And wait

In silence until your footsteps once again carry you home

Or darkness clouds my world forever